Good Family literacy value helps children find their voice.

So often we hear adults conversing and during a single conversation they will change their viewpoint every few minutes to align themselves with whoever is speaking. Even though, every person has views and opinions many are never voiced, simply because people haven’t been encouraged and inspired to share their standpoint. As parents we can assist our children, in developing the skills to share their voice, from when they are still tiny tots.

Until a child goes to school the home provides the primary influence within their life.  What the child sees and hears happening at home is what they’ll imitate.  Unfortunately the saying “do as I say and not what I do,” has no meaning for little people.  Children are created to imitate, it’s the way they were programmed to learn about the world and how they should respond to it. Have you ever wondered why a child has good or bad manners, or where they learned the vocabulary they use?  How often have they dressed in mom or dads clothes and said, “Look, me Dad.”  The same goes towards their intellectual development and attitudes.

If parents and later teachers value books, learning and excellence a child will value these too.  We often scoff at the “whys” of a two year old and yet he is often truly searching.  As they look around the home they make connections and satisfy their “whys” of daily life. As they get older however their minds desire to stretch and pull out further. This is often beyond the walls of the home and the streets of their town. Their “why” draws them out across field and mountain, shore and sea even right into the heart of the universe. From here they desire to step deeper into understanding life, fear, ecstasy, pride, victory and failure. Many of these stretch beyond his immediate experience so it’s through the reading of great books that they can dive into another place time and meet new people. This in turn will stretch and grow their person. Don’t however stop here, throw before them the histories, arts, music, handcrafts and long nature walks. Then you’ll see that even the young child has deep powers of attention, retention, assimilation and curiosity that will help them draw from these meaning and a deeper understanding about life.  As we feed our children this “mind stuff” they begin to take up their journey into self-education.

By adults making their speech colourful and full of life, using big words when talking to a child, talking slowly and stopping between ideas we are training a child to think carefully before he speaks. To choose his words carefully, to have breaks between topics and clearly construct his thoughts encourages a child to consider what they are saying and to say it well.

Yes this does begin upon the mother’s knee as the young child is read to often during their early years. To know a world lies beyond those silent pages, the child soon begins desiring to acquire the gift of reading for themself.  As they charter and explore these new lands deep rooted personal views and opinions begin to grow. As we mirror good speech patterns, encourage great books and curiosity and we value our children and their opinions from a young age, they are well on their way to developing opinions and a voice that they will uphold and will be clearly heard in life.

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Our Senses Made for Learning

senses

As parents and educators we are forever asking ourselves how we can increase and create an optimum learning environment. In all this we often forget that humans are created to learn and the body comes with all the hard and software required for this to take place.  The key factors, which we often tend to forget about, are the senses. These are an integral part of the body and how we are wired to access information, process it and learn from it.

The ability to see is a truly remarkable gift. Therefore when we think of teaching something or imparting information one will often use visual aids. The ability to see allows one to derive one’s own conclusions and after viewing something one is more likely to remember it. Visual stimulation is one of the most used aspects in teaching and learning.

Almost every teacher will tell you the ability to hear and listen are fundamental skills for a child to thrive within our 21 century classrooms. This is because our schools tend to be built largely around the concept of auditory learning.

As the skin is the largest human organ, within our own personal lives touch is probably the most used and influential sense. We use touch to discover all sorts of things about ourselves and the world around us and yet it is probably the least utilised and acknowledged sense!

We are forever telling children to take things out of their mouths – rightly so – however we often forget that this “misbehaviour” is in fact often a natural instinct to discover more about the world in which we live. The sense of taste plays a vital influence in creating meaning and developing understanding, especially in the young child.

We may not often consider smell to be of much importance and yet the ability to smell not only tells us more about the world in which we live but it can in fact save one’s life. We need to take time to encourage children to learn to use and develop this sense in order to detect a stuffy room, smoke and the beauty of a flower’s fragrance.

Our senses are not simply available to help us retain academic information instead they are designed to teach us more about our world, sense danger as well as allow us to rejoice and simply revel in the beauty of the world around us. Our senses allow for us to connect with others and the world at large. They are the fibres that bind us to anything beyond the private walls of our personal existence, they are the channels that allow us to feel and link with everything around us and therefore allow us to create a comprehensive image of what the reality around us truly is.

One must however note here that over stimulation of the body senses can in fact cause “shut down” and prevent, rather than promote learning! We need to be aware of this within all learning situations. We are often so desperate to “get the message across” that we go all out with actions, music, flashing lights and jumping from one activity to the next. The result is however not that the child learns more but that they in fact become over stimulated and basically shut out everything.

We do therefore see that these precious senses, allow for optimum learning to take place, and allow one to absorb and retain information forever. Therefore it’s our responsibility to utilise the senses as much as possible so that children are able to truly embrace and engage the world within which we live.

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Our Turkish Trip

Mist early in the morning. Bolu province / Tur...

This year our homeschool journey has found us learning about the Jewish feasts and studying the Geography of the Holy Land. We have used Ann Voskamp’s book A Child’s Geography – Explore the Holy Land, and it has been an amazing journey so far. This remarkable book has allowed us to embark upon an amazing Turkish trip.

This imaginary Turkish trip has left me wishing that I could travel there today. Never before did I realise that Turkey was where Ephesus was or that Abraham has lived in Turkey or that this was where Mnt Ararat is. I think that  have learned and enjoyed this as much as the children.

 

We decided to finish our Turkish trip with a Turkish meal. We tried our hand at making Turkish delight – but it didn’t work too well, but kids still enjoyed the yummy goo we concocted.

We then prepared some flat Turkish bread

 

and tavuk sis kebabes that Lord Dad cooked on the braai / coals for us while

we made some yumurtah ispanak (spinage and egg) in the kitchen.

Once we were all ready we found a youtube video of some whirling dervishes and some Turkish music online and we settled around our table to share the joys and mysteries we had discovered on this most intriguing Turkish trip we had taken.

 

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Creativity – the Heart of Humanity

Creativity is a natural extension of our enthusiasm” by Earl Nightingale

Whether we wish to acknowledge it or not, the heart of humanity is the ability and desire to create. People are born to reproduce and create what is within their hearts. If the heart is filled with joy or pain, fear or anticipation it’s through the ability to create that one is able to express what lies deep within in such a way that the world outside is able to share it with us too.

From the toddler who squishes some play dough into a rough bird’s nest to the next Van Gough every human carries within them the need to be creative. So often as parents we spend our time, money and effort directing our children to their academic studies and sports that we leave little room for them to develop their creative being. Subjects such as art, music, drama and dance are viewed as luxuries, frivolous add-ones. When in fact these are the core of ones being and if a child is able to develop the skill in a creative area they will often be able to focus more on their academic work as they have a way to  pour out what is bottled up within them.

Somewhere along the line we began to rank and rate creativity. It became boxed and structured stating that only certain forms and methods were the correct means of creativity. We do therefore all tend to shun and pull away from creative forms that we are not fully proficient in. “Oh, I can’t sing,” or “don’t ask me to draw,” are comments that we hear more frequently from adults than we do a 5 year old. Why have we become so hampered? We are much more capable than a pre-schooler and yet we are inhibited by an irrational fear of not being able to create well enough. But well enough for who? Unless we are performing to an audience who has paid a great deal to see a master performer, we are all pretty much on the same ground. We are simply creating for the joy of the creation not necessarily to compare the final product with that of an expert.

Without the freedom, the time and confidence to create we are building a nation upon the fallacy that creativity is of no value and that a strong nation is built upon
the mind and physical strength alone.  However it’s not the functional policies and documents or the number of battles won that build a nation, instead it’s the creative, passion within humanity. It’s the poets writing to encourage young men to a battle, the journalist at the scene creating the image of horror or exuberance within the mind of the reader, it’s the cartoonist capturing a pivotal moment, the solo violinist that holds a single note at the perfect moment, the activist’s voice of passion drawing the people together, the protestors placards, the child’s sandcastles upon the beach and granny’s chocolate cookies that build a nation

Throughout history moments in time have been remembered and captured with a pen, a shout, songs, the paintbrush, musical chords, a photograph or legendary tales handed down word of mouth to generation after generation.

There is no doubt about it, creativity pumps within our blood and beats within our hearts. The question does however remain what are we doing to foster this need of creativity within the life of not only our children but within our lives too?

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The Art of Storytelling

English: A man in heavy robes animatedly telli...

As far back as we can trace human existence; story telling has formed an integral backbone in all cultures!  Story tellers have not only passed down history mixed with legend but they also brought news, taught valuable lessons through narrative text and shared fundamental pieces of their culture with generation after generation.

 Yet once again in our technological, communicative age we’ve lost the need for good story telling.  Yes, many of us enjoy reading a good book but as the years go by so the standard of the books being produced are generally dwindling.

Without growing up amongst story tellers, or great books, our children now need to be trained to tell a good story. Many pre-schoolers and primary school children battle telling their news about what they did in the holidays or over a weekend. Yet, they can all tell great tales about another’s misdemeanours. When describing another’s disobedience or a dangerous feat, then their faces are alive and their voices animated.  Is this because adults actually look up and pay attention when children bring tall tales but seldom acknowledge their speech when told about finding a tortoise in their garden?

As soon as your child can string sentences together and recall an event, write it down, praise them, show them where you wrote it and then read it to someone else in front of your child.  If your child is not yet a competent writer ask them to verbally tell a story whilst you write it for them.  Too often we expect children to write down their thoughts before they are able to write competently.  This results in them having to concentrate exceptionally hard to form their letters correctly, worry about spelling and capital letters, during which time they lose the story line.  We then expect them to read their scrawled words to try rediscover where they were. We could compare this to expecting a fireman to perform a heart operation, whilst reading the manual on how to do it at the same time. Instead let’s help our children as best as we can. When their faces are beaming and the story is flowing, grab a pen and write it for them.

To help encourage story telling within your daily life allow your child to read their stories onto tape or video themselves.  On holiday recall the day’s events around a camp fire, encourage animation and expression.  At the dinner table talk about your daily experiences.  Let this happen in such a way that your child wants to be involved in the conversation and share their stories too.  Above all listen to your child and show interest in whatever it is they want to tell you.

Reading together, from birth, cannot be over emphasised.  A few generations back only a few people in each community could read.  This meant that story time was an event, everyone would gather around to listen to the story being read.  Through listening to the story teller’s voice and watching their facial animations others would have been able to recount what they had heard.  Too often we think once a child can read they no longer need to be read to.  On the contrary, they are now ready to learn how to read with expression and retell their own stories, which is learned through watching and listening to others read to them.

Story telling is an art that is being lost. Like all other arts it needs to be practiced and honed. Let us let our homes be an encouraging and safe place for our children to develop this fundamental life skill.

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Love is a Verb

Parenting and education is not all about “doing the right thing” and “getting our discipline just right,” often it’s simply about enjoying each other’s company and creating forever memories. We can tell our children we love them. We can demonstrate that we love them. But nothing speaks as loud as simply living out love with them and this often occurs by simply having fun together.

With Valentine’s Day popping its head around the corner we are presented with so many creative and exciting ways to celebrate real love with our children. Over the generations Valentine’s Day has become an exclusively romantic celebration, when in fact it provides the ideal opportunity for us to celebrate real love and demonstrate that love to our children.

Spend some time thinking through your day on 14 February and what little moments you can snatch up to woo and love your children. Some suggestions may be to decorate the breakfast table with hearts and flowers the night before and then get up that little bit earlier and pop some scones in the oven for breakfast (or buy some yummy muffins.) Candles go really far to create a special ambiance that even our children will appreciate. Have little paper hearts upon the table with each person’s name on them. During the day every family member needs to write something they love about that person on their heart so that they can be distributed at dinner time. With younger children you may want to build up to the day so that Valentine’s Day provides us with no only opportunities to love our own family but to let our children demonstrate love for others.

Children often feel that the world is all about them. Yes, they are aware of others and that they need to care for them but it’s seldom that we provide opportunities for them to do this and grow in their love for others. Valentine’s Day provides the perfect opportunity to do just that. You may not be able to do anything on Valentine’s Day owing to work and school commitments but there is always the weekend. A few ideas would be to make cards to drop off at an old age home, take a cake to an orphanage, make cupcakes and cards and drop them off with librarians, police officers or firemen. A child could make special cards for their teachers and friends. they know what it is all about. You can make crowns for them to wear with hearts upon them and laminate place mats onto which they have stuck hearts or drawn a picture of the family having a fun time together.  If the morning is a rush there is still the evening in which to do something special together. You may want to have a special meal or as a family choose someone that you feel needs to “be loved” to share dinner with you. Simply spend some time doing something fun and different together. Have a picnic supper in the garden, play a family game together,  go for a walk, pop secret notes into each other’s lunch boxes or place beside each of your children’s beds a single rose with a handwritten love note. The ideas are endless. Yes, they do all take time but that’s part of loving one another – the fact that we take time to do it.

By simply taking a few moments out of our busy schedules to make a day special or different for our families we are speaking volumes. We often forget that concepts such as “love” are actually verbs and that our children can only truly learn about them by seeing them in action.

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Ok – So My Son is Gifted

There I said it! My Son is gifted!

Unlike Autism, ADHD, Down Syndrome or Dyslexia, Giftedness is something we don’t talk about. It’s something we dare not utter a word about because when we do we are shouted down for boasting and being proud. (As we see the author of “I Hate Hearing About Your Gifted Child” just did.) Thank you Laughing at Chaos , AwayFromTheOven and LifeWithinIntensity for your inspiring blog replies. They made me ralise it’s time for me to be bold enough to let others to hear from us too.

I am not sure why people feel so judged and threatened by gifted children when in fact that’s just who they are. They function differently from the rest of us and see and hear the world from an entirely different perspective. Why is different so intimidating and somehow wrong?
It’s how you think, how you perceive and how you breath. Being gifted isn’t something you can turn on and off, it isn’t something you can work hard at and become, it isn’t being talented or skilled in an area such as sport or music. Instead it’s just who you are.

Gifted children are not at the top of the class, they often the “plebs” who’ve been misdiagnosed with ADHD and are sitting on Ritalin. They are often the trouble makers and those just skimming through each grade. These are not children to be threatened by instead they are an endangered species that we need to save. These children are able to offer so much and yet we are pushing them aside, discriminating against them and drugging them. So many resources are available for Learners with Special Needs – who battle through the system and yet there are none available for my learner with special needs.

He began reading at 22 months, when he was 5 he was reading encyclopedias. I called a school to enroll him in grade 1. I asked what they would do with him while the others learned to read their response, “He’ll just need to suck it up and wait for the others to catch up.”

So we homeschool – by choice – well yes… Until I hit a real wobbly last year and wanted to send them all to school. Again a phone call. “I have a 9 year doing grade 7 maths and high school reading and language.

Can we enroll him next year?” Reply: “Well, he’ll need to go into grade 4 and we’d try extend him but he’ll need to do grade 4.” Imagine! That’s like telling a 3rd year varsity student that they need to go back and start varsity over again. So yes we love homeschooling but it’s no longer only by choice, we are kind of out of options.

When saying my day is tough other homeschoolers have turned around and said, “but at least your child reads what do you have to complain about?” Well my gifted child is reading – but he reads anything and everything he lays his eyes on. That includes billboards, newspapers and the Bible. Maybe that sounds like a dream, but is it? When your child is 5 and having sleepless nights because of world hunger or trying to understand death and eternity at 3 years of age. How do you explain to a 6 year old about government taxes and the economy crashing when he wants to know about why the government is repossessing houses? The best yet is trying to explain God’s judgment, justice and grace to a 5 year old.

How about seeing the world only as black or white. Everything is either good or bad. There is no grey. Everything has to be justified and fair. The rules, every rule needs to be kept. The world is so loud and bright and the sensory overload can be so great that melt downs are apart of ones reality. One who needs to move to think. The pressure of thinking one needs to be perfect and not being able to sleep at night as their mind is so alive. So the list continues.

The intensity so great that Mom and Dad fall into bed exhausted every night. And they say siblings are usually not far behind each other. As our little ones are growing they may not fall into the profoundly gifted category, like their brother, but they too are following close behind. Can you imagine to intensity of these little people trying to all help me make supper, tell me about their day or work on an art project? No it’s not horrid just very noisy, opinions flying, conversations heated and everything being analysed. Nothing can just be “because it just is.” But why?


Looking at just a few of the gifted “symptoms” mentioned above would it make everyone feel better if I say my son has a “syndrome.” May I mention that besides doing grade 7 maths, he’s just finishing writing his first novel at 9 and that he’s busy building a birding website, he plays the violin beautifully, he writes wonderful poetry and he is the most amazing big brother. Or am I only allowed to dwell on his “syndrome symptoms?” We have been blessed with an amazing little boy who is tender hearted and loves with his whole heart – another symptom I suppose: Gifted children either do something completely or not at all.

For 9 years I have kept quiet but I can’t let others tear down something so beautiful and pure as the gifted child – without which there’d be no Mozart, theory of relativity or Starry Night. Just as I see every human as a unique creation by God and rejoice in who they are, don’t see our gifted children as a threat, simply see them for the beautiful people they are and celebrate that you too may one day benefit from what they have to offer this world.

So just aswe need to raise our voices to save the rain forests so we need to raise our voices to save the Gifted Child who is just like everyone else – just wants to be accepted and loved for who they are. Instead of trying to box them and feel threatened by something new just try to understand the gifted child and you maybe pleasantly surprised with what you find!

Pearl Buck sums giftedness in the most beautiful way….

“The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this: 

A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive. 

To him… 

a touch is a blow, 

a sound is a noise, 

a misfortune is a tragedy, 

a friend is a lover, a joy is an ecstasy, 

a lover is a god, 

and failure is death. 

Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create – - – so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, his very breath is cut off from him. He must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency he is not really alive unless he is creating.”


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Just a Few Ways We Do School

Just for fun I thought I’d quickly share with you just a few pics from around the house on how you may find us “doing school.”

Doing Spelling

Doing Maths Bonds and Tables

Handwriting

Desk Work

Long division – yes that is on my passage floor!

Geography

Science usually happens by accident.

More maths made for lunch.

Self discovery and explorations.

Baking

And lots of Books.

I could just keep going all evening but that gives you a quick glimpse into how you may see us “doing school” on any given day. Enjoy the ride.

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Free to Choose

English: Portrait of a girl from Portugal

What is it that all humans crave, strive for and will die for? Freedom.  Freedom to be ourselves, freedom to make our own choices and to have the right to be who we are. Freedom is a powerful concept and realisation, for one to be able to express ones freewill is the ultimate human experience. To be able to choose, to be able to decide for yourself and do exactly as one wishes gives one not only the feeling of liberty but one of power, integrity and self-worth.

If as parents we tap into this inbuilt desire for one to be able to express our own freewill we are able to make parenting and discipline all that much easier – as the child ends up doing all the work for us. As with all aspects of life one may have the right to express ones freewill, however there is a natural law that sees that every action results in a consequence. Children need to learn that their choices result in natural consequences.

Within the home or school one needs to have boundaries and acceptable conduct. The children then need to be aware of the choices they may choose from and what the consequences may be. It could look something like this: It is decided that within your home you don’t permit hitting. Therefore a child who chooses to hit – experiences a natural consequence – they are removed from all other children and are required to sit alone until such time as they choose to no longer hit. There is no time limit set on their “timeout” as once they choose to apologise and change their behaviour the natural consequence is that they may return. If however they hit again, well they are again removed.

As parents it is our responsibility to let our children know about the choices they have before them and what the consequences of these choices may be. We then leave them to choose and simply ensure that the natural consequences play their roll. If homework is not complete they may miss going to the beach as they need to complete it on Saturday. If they choose to not help tidy their room they may need to miss a movie to do it. This is very different from threatening or punishing a child who does not complete their task.  It is rather a natural result of the choices they have made.

The great part about tapping into the desire for one to express one’s own freewill is that you are able to step back and no longer need to rant and rave and become emotionally involved. As parents we are often too scared to allow our children to make their own choices. Instead we take on the responsibility of deciding for them and so prevent them from feeling the pain of poor choices. The result being not only that the parents are becoming more and more tense and emotionally drained but children are not learning to take responsibility and ownership for the choices they make.

Choices are fantastic, they make parenting so much easier because if a child is offered the choice to obey or share or work in a team and they choose not to it’s their choice and they are in effect “choosing their consequences.” A child may not choose what one thinks is wise or good or right but that is how they learn. Rather they learned the pain and joy of expressing their freewill within the safety of their home than to feel the full pain of making foolish choices later in life.

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To Chore or Not to Chore

In our home we choose to chore :)

From the day a child can walk – without falling over – they start to help pick things up, put away dishes and do anything a little person is able to do. From about aged 2 or 3 (depending on the child) they are given specific “responsibilities.”

Changing the term form “Chores” to “Responsibilities” changed the whole attitude and feel in our home. The little ones may need to feed an animal whilst the older ones have either more responsiblities or more demanding ones. The children love having responsibilities and will become quite upset if someone does one of theirs. It makes them feel needed, rooted and that they have a place within the home.

When our children turn 13 we have a evening to celebrate their “pre-adulthood” and with this comes greater responsibility. So at present our 14 year old is responsible for the washing. Well, I ensure it is washed and hung up and then it’s up to her. She need to bring it in, fold it and put it away. I love how she’s begun putting on CDs so the little ones all want to listen and then she gets them to all fold the washing with her. This is great as it teaches her to not let the washing (or anything in life for that matter) pile up and how much hard work it takes to truly be responsible for something as well as many other life lessons. She also has a number of other responsibilities such as washing the breakfast dishes and clearing the kitchen after supper.

The other children have responsibilities such feeding animals, making beds, putting clothes away, putting dishes away. Sometimes children require some direction and help such as I may need to place their duvet at the bottom of their bed neatly so they can pull it up to make their bed. Other times they may need to be given a more specific task such as – pick up all the red blocks. Often children become overwhelmed when given a task too big and therefore their reluctance to help is actually that they don’t really know where to start.

For these responsibilities our children are not remunerated. We all have a part to play and a role to fill to be apart of the family. This is also a chance to train them in loving others. If someone is sick or away we step in and help each other out. If however they are asked to do something that I would usually employ someone else to do such as mow the lawn we will show our appreciation by giving them some money towards something they are saving up for.

We do also try to make it fun. So we’ll often play Amazing Race where I give them tasks to complete in a set time (these can range from washing dishes, to scrubbing a wall, to peeling and freezing bananas.) If the task is completed they get a small prize – raisins, a snack, or such and the next clue. If it isn’t completed in time once it is completed they need to run around the house, miss the treat and then get the next clue. I find they don’t cope with more than 5 activities in a game so after the 4th or 5th task they get a grand prize – an ice-cream (or my favourite: to watch a DVD – in the middle of the day – and I get to have a quiet cup of coffee:)

Another game we play is the “Post Box Game.” I put some tasks into a box. The children then need to sneak up and get a clue and do the task without me seeing them. I obviously know where they are but pretend to not hear them and then I suddenly turn around or jump out at them. We all have great fun with this and yes the chores get done too. Otherwise music is good on a whole. Listening to worship songs or stories helps them to not dwell on the fact that they are doing chores. Oh yes and we also sometimes have everyone folding washing while I read to them.

This may not work for every family but for us it’s been a great balance and an opportunity to teach our children about responsibility, love, running a home and what being a family is all about.

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